Like a chess game, every move I made right or wrong cemented my image in the eyes of my children. I'm finishing up authoring a book I have been writing over the last 10 years about my experiences as a black father the good, the bad, the ugly and I just want to share some of the manuscripts with you before I release the project. Every chapter of this book was written as the emotional drama unfolded in living color. I hope you will not only feel my pain but see my struggle to survive fatherhood. I never had a clear blueprint to becoming a father because my father died when I was young so I saw choppy pieces of being a father from various role models and family members. I had to figure out a way of piecing together all this information. Here are my thoughts and feelings.'  Black fatherhood men fail to openly communicate about our emotional experiences in a public forum. Outside of barbershops or a drunken depressed stupor most men hold in their feelings of vulnerabil